Alex’s Un-Scary Movie Challenge: Godzilla (2014)

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Here at Spooky Colorado, we’re interested in more than just haunted houses. We like to get scared any way we can, and that includes the odd horror movie. The problem is, I’ve never found a movie that scared me, ever. Sure I’m susceptible to the odd startle scare just like everyone else, but no movie has ever had me sleeping with the lights on and a baseball bat under my pillow. I’m on a quest to change that. Think you know a film that’s up to the challenge? Visit our contact page and select “Alex’s Un-Scary Movie Challenge” from the dropdown.

 

GZA_250x250_GooglePlus_Profile_rev copyIn this edition, we take a look at the new Godzilla movie which, as far as I can tell, is the story of how enormous prehistoric creatures from the Earth’s distant past have all banded together to wipe out one man’s entire lineage, past present and future. Oh, and also there’s some stuff about nature and balance and things like that. But mostly, a bunch of monsters just show up with the expressed goal of ruining one guy’s day. Hard.

Scare Factor 5
Acting 7
Props/Sets/FX 9
Length 6
Total 6.75

It’s been a pretty bad dry spell for the “giant freaky monsters crushing our city” genre lately. The best we got in the last decade was Pacific Rim, where for the first time in a long time humans actually found a good way to bring the fight back to the monsters. No ineffectually spraying them with bullets, no sir! The only way to respond to a threat of this nature is with GIANT. FREAKING. ROBOTS!

TAKE THAT MONSTERS!

TAKE THAT MONSTERS!

That wasn’t a bad thing, in and of itself, but it felt very far removed from the spirit of the movies that had come before, which basically featured enormous monsters duking it out with the massive collateral damage as basically a side effect. And we could talk about Matthew Broderick’s Godzilla from 1998, but the less said about that movie, the better.

Hello moviegoers! Godzilla here! Just being a giant Tyrannosaurus Rex like I always am.

Hello moviegoers! Godzilla here! Just being a giant Tyrannosaurus Rex like I always am.

I saw Godzilla with a couple of friends from work last week, and it was pretty good, I have to say. The buzz about this movie has been going strong since it was first announced, and I’ve been hearing my friends say that it’s going to be fantastic, a work of giant-monster fighting art that is everything that Pacific Rim was not.

I actually liked Pacific Rim when I saw it, but I think I was predisposed to that position before I got into the theater, mainly because the computer voice was none other than Ellen McClain, basically making it GLaDOS the Movie for any of the more obsessive Portal fans out there (protip: there are a lot of these people in the world). But if I take a step back and look at the whole movie objectively, I can see that, yes, there are definitely points in the film that had fairly significant issues to overcome.

None of that is to say that Godzilla doesn’t have some of those same issues to overcome as well, but this latest entry in a long series of films about men in rubber suits dressed as giant lizards laying waste to huge sections of Japanese landscape comes from a pretty good starting place just by nature of its lineage. Overall, it seems like a fairly solid Godzilla movie… but does that make it a good movie period? The answer is a resounding… maybe. Let’s dive in.

WARNING: Significant plot details after the jump. Spoilers abound. Danger of being crushed by prehistoric creatures is high.

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